Paul O'Flaherty

The Blogosphere Is Dead And Its Your Fault

Killing ourselves off!

Warning: ** If you’re easily offended I suggest you click off to another blog this instant because I will offend your delicate sensibilities. This post is about the blogosphere in its entirety and not about any one particular individual or their actions. **

I am sick to death of the blogsphere. It’s weak, it’s spineless and has about as much veracity as a neutered, toothless, three legged Chihuahua.

It’s dying.

I’d love to know what the root cause of the blogospheres apathetic decline into little more than a circle-jerk for various communities is, but I’m betting that from here on in we’re pretty much screwed.

We’ve descended into a mob of self serving, self centered sheeple that act with about as much individuality a a shoal of fish. One of us reacts and we all react, we all panic. We all cling to each other like sprat on the shores of community while the mackerel devour us.

We secretly despise each others success and revel in others failure, all the while acting like we’re all the best of buddies and that everything everybody writes is amazing and smells like roses.

Well it does smell like roses, until you realize it’s the smell of the bullshit you’ve thrown on the roses to fertilize them.

This weekend I’ve been deeply disturbed by the wishy washy, head stuck in the sand, lets avoid reality when it’s spitting down our throats,  nature of a fairly substantial number of my fellow bloggers.

The entire @MyBottlesUp story just sums it all up for me. Here you have a woman who blatantly fabricated a story that a goverment agency took her child from her. Tweeted about it wrote about it, tried to cash in on her “story” and then when faced with undeniable video evidence that it had never happened, accused the TSA of doctoring the video.

No remorse, no guilt, just more accusations.

So the TSA released more video. 9 videos in fact, showing her entire journey through airport security, sometimes from various angles.

The response of some of the people: “The TSA are faking it” or worse (because I can actually understand that there are a lot of wing-nut conspiracy freaks out there donning  their silver foil hats) the response of those who think we should let it be because she’s “not well”. She suffers from anxiety and substance abuse.

She was well enough to make this shit up. She was well enough to write about it. To tweet about lining up publishers. Well enough to try to pretend her site was down and to write a long response refuting the undeniable evidence.

Yet people want to protect her. They want to make excuses. They would much rather we all look like one big idiot community than do what is needed.

Take a stand. Say what she did was wrong and unfollow her. Unfollow her and unsubscribe from her everywhere. If she wants back make her earn it. Make her apologize.

A prime example of this spineless behavior is Blog with Integrity. You may have seen it, it’s a square blue badge which adorns some bloggers sites stating that they have basically signed a pledge to be goodie goodies… It’s noble. Naive, but noble.

@MyBottleUp proudly displays the “blog with integrity” badge on her sidebar. When the people behind the “I’m holier than thou emblem” were asked what their stance was on all the goings on, they responded by scurrying into the corner like mice afraid of their own shadow. They chose to stay out of it because you know, a blogger sporting their badge should never have to be talked to or asked to have it removed when they violate the principles it is supposed to represent.

Over the weekend, a blogger wrote a negative post about her experiences with the TSA during an airport security screening. The TSA refuted her claims in a post that included video of the incident. The inevitable blogstorm ensued.

The blogger displays the Blog with Integrity badge on her blog, and we have been asked in email, in posts and on Twitter about the matter. Some have called for us to ask her to remove the badge. Others merely wonder what we will do.

Here is our position:

Disputes and disagreements are between the parties involved. There are two sides to every story. It’s only fair to let a story play out before anyone makes up their mind.

Blog with Integrity is a voluntary community effort. Not a regulatory body. We don’t make decisions about your integrity. You do. Your readers do. The badge is a symbol of a blogger’s personal commitment to the principles of the pledge; only he or she can decide whether or not to display it.

In this case, we hope that everyone who has blogged, commented or tweeted about the incident will take the opportunity to re-examine his or her own words, and act accordingly.

Remember the final line of the pledge: “I own my words. Even if I occasionally have to eat them.”

Up Yours!

Bullshit! Your badge either means something or it doesn’t. You are either serious about what it represents or you’re not.

If you’re going to shy away at the first point of contention then why even bother in the first place. Good intentions have never gotten anybody anywhere.

What exactly does the badge stand for if any unscrupulous twat can just slap it on the side of his or her blog and claim they’ve got integrity as if some mighty Monty Python finger descended from the heavens and shoved integrity up their backside?

I’m not one for regulating the blogosphere. But you know what? If it was my badge I would do some of the following in order to make it mean something:

• Have a registry of sites that are displaying the badge.
• Use some kind of script to track the distribution of the badge so it is tied to each website and if they violate the pledge turn off the badge.
• Make community regulation an integral part of the system. After all it’s so much easier to stick to the rules when you have people supporting you and possibly snitching on you if you cheat…
• Act like I give a shit when stuff like this goes down.

Don’t get me wrong I don’t really want to regulate the blogosphere, in fact I’ve lambasted Tim O’Reilly and others for suggesting such silliness in the past. But that said, if you’re going to try to do it, dear “Blog with Integrity” people, then for feck sake at least do it right!

I’m truly sick of todays blogosphere, where the ultra polite and light on brainwave activity have massive zombie hordes follower numbers while those who dare to express an actual opinion are ostracized to the edges of mediocrity. I honestly believe that John C Dovark is the only person to have crossed that divide, but that still plays out as a poor reflection on that esteemed section of the blogging community that act like everything is one great big group hug with Barney the purple pedophile.

Heaven forbid that someone be different. That someone suggest we don’t all have to brown nose each other all the time.

When the hell is the blogosphere going to finally grow up and stop moaning about what it doesn’t have, what bloggers believe (naively) they are entitled to and act like adults.

Adults can have opinions. We don’t have to go along with the crowd. We can do something different and be part of the community.We don’t have to think that every god damn post by every idiot we just happen to know is praiseworthy to the point of gushing…

We can call a spade a spade. We can call people out for what they’ve done wrong and praise them for what they’ve achieved. We can regulate ourselves without a laid out set of rules or crappy badges in our sidebars. I mean seriously who besides those that display them know what they’re for anyway?

All we have to do is accept that we are adults and that we have a community to protect and build if we ever want to get taken seriously.

Treat the community as a plant with each one of us acting as a gardener. I know that sounds daft but stick with me.

If a bit is rotten, does wrong, then don’t just ignore it. Cut it off. Each of us, one at a time. If that part heals, grows strong again, then let it back in for another chance.

If we all act like little gardeners and follow our own individual moral compass and just decide to unsubscribe, unfollow and not visit the blogs of people who we feel are not in the best interest of the community we will eventually find a natural middle ground where everyone is comfortable.

Yes the community will split. Probably into a number of parts. The marketers and spammers will find themselves marketing and spamming each other. The trolls will have nobody to play with etc… But the core will remain and just like cutting the dead branches off a tree in order to save it, the community will begin to grow and flourish again.

If we can just drop this, everybody be nice to everybody about everything no matter what attitude, the blogosphere will be a far better place and may actually start to earn some respect.

We need to drop the “He’s local so I’ll follow his blog or on twitter even though he’s a dick” bullshit. The same within communities such as mommybloggers. You can’t protect the idiots from themselves so let them go, let them die off.

Darwin called it natural selection. Survival of the fittest. The weak, infirm and just plain stupid die off so as not to pollute the gene pool and damage the entire species.

We’ve been protecting and making excuses for far too long. They’re like a cancer and our acceptance and encouragement is only weakening the entire body and eating us up from the inside while we trot around like idiots with our rose tinted glassed on pretending that everything is fine.

Very soon the only bloggers remaining will be barely capable of thought in more the 140 character bursts and only capable of that if they are participating in a community reach around scheme.

Culling the herd is a common practice to stop the spread of disease so that all the animals aren’t lost. If we don’t cull some of our herds, and soon, there won’t be any blogosphere left worth protecting.

People like Peoria Pundit Remind Me Why The Internet Lacks Integrity

I admit that I get wound up a little from time to time and need to vent but not so often as when a spineless, whiney twat like Billy Dennis, the so called Peoria Pundit makes a public swing at me on Twitter and then takes it down later on.

As readers of this site well know, me having a go at people is far from unheard of. I had a go at Scoble and a bunch of other people over the weekend for not upgrading their WordPress installs when security releases were made available and then complaining when they got hacked.

Mr. Peoria Pundit then decided to visit this blog (while he was supposed to be busy restoring services to the users of his downed WPMU site) and had a go at me for giving out to people for acting like idiots while blaming the universe and it’s mother for their failure to be proactive about security.

Now, I have no problem with Billy Dennis or anybody else coming to this blog and telling me off. I encourage it. It’s why I have a comments section. I encourage public discussion, but what I can’t stand is cowardice and cowardly is the only way I can describe someone who puts up a tweet making fun of someone one and the removes it later on. They don’t have the balls to let what they say stand in public.

Billy Dennis did just that. At some point the night before last, after coming to this blog and whining about how I was being so hard on those poor poor idiots who don’t look after their online property, he felt the need to post this on Twitter:

Hey, @pauloflaherty you called WPMU who don’t upgrade stupid, but YOUR site is down. HA ha.

I would never have noticed, nor would this have even been blog worthy except for the fact that it had been deleted at some point before I logged in to twitter, but my RSS feed of search results for replies to @pauloflaherty caught both the tweet and Mr. Dennis acting like a spanked child throwing a tantrum.

Let’s clarify something here. Firstly, there’s the fact that this idiot is misquoting me as I never called WPMU users who don’t upgrade stupid, well not specifically anyway, I called everyone who doesn’t upgrade any software when security releases are pushed ASAP, stupid. I’m an equal opportunity insulter that way.

Secondly, my sites were down intermittently over the weekend and yesterday due to my host moving our accounts to new servers. It caused some major cock-ups, which they have apologized for and appear to have gotten sorted.

The downtime was not caused by my neglecting to upgrade our WordPress installs or plugins, or perform backups.

Dennis’s actions are a clear indicator of what is wrong with citizen publishing on the internet. It’s all too easy for someone to come out, attack someone and then remove the evidence before it is seen by the person being targeted. Or in Billy Dennis case before any of his followers realise what a child he was being.

Making matters worse is that Billy Dennis lists himself as a former journalist and should know all too well the implications of hitting that send or publish button.

This is the exact type of incident that makes me wish services like Twitter and Facebook didn’t have a delete button. What you write should stand, for good or for bad.

Defending the delete button by saying people make mistakes is a cop out. If you didn’t mean it, why did you type it and hit send or publish in the first place. If you don’t have the integrity to stand by what you write you shouldn’t be writing.

Far better to make the mistake and admit or apologise to it, than to erase the evidence and slink off into the night like a whimpering dog with your tail between your legs. As you can see from this post, the evidence never really disappears!

WordPress (or Mashable) Users Can’t Be This Stupid? Can They?

I’ve just seen Mashables post about a security exploit that exists in older versions on Wordpress, versions prior to 2.8.4, and how imperative it is that you upgrade your self hosted WordPress immediately. Of course the post is getting a lot of attention across the interwebs and on sites like Twitter.

Like what I hope are the vast majority of WordPress users, I shrugged my shoulders and paid very little heed to it as it’s only a concern for installs older than 2.8.4. We’re running WordPress on all but one of our 9 sites and like most people we upgraded to 2.8.4 as soon as it was released and always upgrade to the newest release straight away.

The only thing that ever stops us upgrading immediately is if there is a conflict with one of our plugins which we set about fixing straight away and then upgrade ASAP.

After all, WordPress is like any other piece of software. It may run on your server or webhost but just like your windows installation it requires regular updating for stability, speed and security improvements.

Unless you have a very specific reason not to (other than you are just too lazy to upgrade your plugins or theme), upgrading to the latest version is always a must.

Anyhow, I was calling WordPress users stupid wasn’t I? Or was that Mashable readers? Actually it’s the segment of WordPress users who commented on Pete Cashmores post today, who obviously failed to comprehend the article and have issues with the most simple of advice! Upgrade Now!

Here’s some examples for your amusement:

Σχολή Χορού That’s really annoying. I have some blogs about dancing with very personalized themes and who knows what will happen if i upgrade.

You’ll get hacked and all your pretty personalized themes will disappear forever.

happymind how do you upgrade ??????

See the button that says “Upgrade Automatically” – Click it! When was the last time you logged in to your WordPress Dashboard?

Mitzi Szereto yeah, but everytime i log in, i see that the NEW version has holes in it, and they have to keep fixing it. so frankly, i am not sure i trust it. nor i am sure i trust that it won’t screw up my entire site.

and:

i’m still on 2.7.1 – should i leave it the hell alone? please advise.

Yes, they’re called fixes. Your old version probably has all the vulnerabilities and more of the new versions. They’re fixing the problems as they find them. As for you still being on 2.7.1 – Is it really that hard to comprehend –“Upgrade Now!”. Tell you what, stay on 2.71. Can’t wait for lazy people like you to start bitching about WordPress security when you get hacked.

ronaldredito This is annoying! Can anyone pinpoint who is behind this?

Yes, it was Barrack Obama! It’s a plot to take over the world by brainwashing everybody through plugins that have been covertly installed in WordPress blogs, which then send subliminal suggestions to everyone prompting them to elect him in for another 4 years and agree with all his policy decisions. And the WordPress dev team are going to just start taking out people like him instead of ever working on security updates. Assassinating random people  is much more cost effective and less disruptive to the WordPress user base than pushing security releases.

Arthur Wilkie And this is why I use Blogger…

I’m really, seriously praying that was sarcasm Arthur

achernow Already did the upgrade apparently.

Maybe the hacker did it to prevent any more hackers taking control of your WP? Sheesh, how could you not know you upgraded, and why would you need to post that you had?

Okay, obviously these people aren’t stupid, but they are very naive and I’ve got to ask myself, if you’re not confident enough to deal with upgrades, plugin upgrades and security releases on self hosted WordPress installs why are you using it in the first place?

Don’t cite customization to me as a reason, as if you’re confident enough to customize the PHP in your themes files you should be able to at least perform an upgrade!

I know some of you are going to call me elitist and an arse for making fun of people who are less knowledgeable in this area, but lets be serious, if you’ve been using WordPress since 2.7.1 (came out 7 months ago)… enough said!

Update 15/09/2009:

Just came across this excellent post by Jeff Chandler: “Are You Responsible Enough To Run WordPress?“

Online Activism Has Its Head Up Its Arse

Alan Turing was a great man. He was code breaker for the British government during World War 2 and an instrumental figure in computer science, yet he suffered the major indignity of being prosecuted by the then British government for being gay.

Not only was he prosecuted, but he was then chemically castrated and committed suicide 2 years after.

Sad story and unfortunately true.

So what has the unfortunate tale of Alan Turing got to do with online activism? Gizmodo ran an article yesterday about a petition being setup in order to have the British government apologize (I presume to his family) for his prosecution and castration.

As I said the story of Turing is sad and unfortunate and he deserves his apology, but let’s be honest here, aren’t there better things we can be doing if we’re really interested in being “activists” (there’s a reason I put that in quotes which I’ll get to in a bit) and making a difference?

Human trafficking, climate change, cancer research, child molestation, education reform, demilitarization, disarmament, development of the Third World…. The list goes of problems that can be addressed that actually exist today goes on and on ad infinitum yet, we’re going to get our collective activist mentalities in a twist because Turing had his plonk chopped off in 1954?

How many other people did this happen to? Where are their petitions?

How many other people suffered injustices in the past that will never have a petition created for them?

There is the problem with online activism. It isn’t! It’s the lazy man (or woman) signing an email address or clicking a link to something that he doesn’t really care about. That he’s not invested in.

The online activist will probably have forgotten by dinner time what petition they’ve signed at lunch time!

Online activism is cheap and cheerful! 5000 or 50000 email addresses may look impressive but at the end of the day they mean bugger all and achieve about as much.

Real activism means getting out there, talking to people. It means people who are actually interested separating the hermetic seal which has developed between their backsides and the couch and making their voice heard. Meeting local politicians, organizing meetings, protesting, creating a real groundswell of opinion amongst people who actually care.

It’s all very well to talk about it on the web. The web can be used as an amazing tool to inform those who care about what is going on and to draw people to where the real activism occurs.

Real activism occurs in your home, in the streets, in conversation with the politicians, in the choices you make and actually follow through on. It occurs with placards outside town halls, courthouses and government offices. It means meeting people, talking to them and making them believe. Making them understand, making them actually care!

Activism is not simply adding an email address to an online petition. Any fool can do that and care less.

Update: 11-09-2009 :

The British Government finally gave Alan Turing his apology. We’re still waiting for one for everybody else.

RIP Journalism and Integrity

The internet “reduces opinion diversity of opinion”. Not only that, but it’s also responsible for “less minority and female ownership” and declining job numbers for journalists.

I know many of you are looking at that and going “WTF Paul, are you delirious? Did you have a bad curry or something? It’s obviously blown what little remains of your mind!”.

No, I’m not suffering a bout of dementia, those are in fact, the opinions of Michael Coops, a commissioner with the Federal Communications Commissions and it’s former acting chairman. Not only are they his opinion, but they are opinions he expressed in an internal report examining the state of media journalism in America according to CNSNews.com.

“We’re not only losing journalists, we may be losing journalism,” he said. “Some blame the Internet and bloggers, and that’s certainly a part of the story. All that consolidation and mindless deregulation, rather than reviving the news business, condemned us to less real news, less serious political coverage, less diversity of opinion, less minority and female ownership, less investigative journalism and fewer jobs for journalists.”

Now, far be it from me to moan about the current state of journalism. My last post attacked CNN for having zero journalistic integrity and essentially making lies up to drive readership. I’ve also publicly decried all those bloggers who consider themselves journalists and serious reporters but in all honesty are “me too” hacks sitting at their desks in pajamas stuffing their fat faces with Doritos.

Neither, do I consider myself a journalist. I’m just a guy with an opinion, which is something I’ll get to in a minute.

The simple fact of the matter is that the internet, not blogging or social media which occurs there, is not responsible for the decline in quality journalism.

Human nature is responsible for the decline. People love to be informed, we love to keep up to date, we love to talk to our friends and get the latest “gossip”. You know, Jennie’s pregnant, Rosie’s sleeping with Jim, Carol and Kristen just had a fight and broke up. That sort of thing.

The internet has provided us with mediums to gossip with an exponentially larger circle of “friends” and at a much quicker pace.

Yet the tools that now provide us with a platform to gossip also facilitate the discussion of news beyond the local gossip. They allow us to discuss matters that were previously the sole realm of the journalists and editors of the print and mainstream news machine.

Coops has said that we’re not just losing journalists, we’re losing journalism. Coops is sorely mistaken, at least about losing journalists. We have more of them than ever, they just lack the means to do their jobs.

The internet may provide the platform for you or anybody to express their opinion, but the ability to express your opinion is not what sets journalists apart from the Doritos eating, pajama-clad blogger.

Integrity, a work ethic, and a pay check is what sets a journalist apart.

You may wonder why I mention the pay check. For me, it’s fundamental, because a journalist has a responsibility to be accurate and honest, a responsibly to their readers far beyond that of any blogger, simply because they are paid to.

They produce the content, their publisher, editor etc.. approves it, we consume it and we pay to consume it, via one medium or another, which means that in a very direct way the journalists responsibility is to us.

The journalist works for the readers. Not the newspaper. The newspaper facilitates the distribution of the journalists news, but at the end of the day makes it’s money off of the arrangement between the journalist and the reader: the content creator and the person paying to consume said content.

Which again brings me back to human nature and gossip. Gossip is news without research. Mary tells Ann, who tells Peter, who tells Sharon who tells Jack something completely different that gets posted to Twitter.

Journalists are supposed to provide us with news, or in other words are supposed to provide us with the gossip that has been vetted by them and they are saying is correct. As they are being paid to vouch for this gossip, we take it as news.

Yet journalists are human. As more and more new media news outlets crop up, we get to hear from more and more of these human journalists.

The problem with humans, is that the more of them you meet, the more of our flaws you get exposed to.

One of our biggest flaws is that a lot of us humans are innately lazy. If there is a short cut we’ll take it.

See where I’m going with this? The more journalists we’re exposed to, the more of their flaws we’ll see and that will lead us to spot the lazy ones who only regurgitate news to publish unsubstantiated gossip.

Sounds a lot like the differences between bloggers doesn’t it?

Despite Coops claims of it reducing diversity of opinion the internet has provided us with the tools to give everybody, regardless of race, color, creed, sex or location to express our opinions. To be bloggers and (if only in our minds eye) journalists.

Yet, in giving everybody the ability to report gossip and throw their opinion into the ring, the verified “from the horses mouth” truth gets lost in the noise.

It’s also created an issue for the real journalists out there as they are feeling pressure from those above them to compete with the immediacy of the gossipers.

Let’s get one thing clear: Journalists can never compete with gossip on rapidity of dissemination.

It’s like living in a small town. You can’t do anything without people gossiping about it and usually your mother knows what you were doing before you’ve even done it.

The key to making journalism successful lies in the fact that journalists are expected to have integrity because they are paid by us to have it. They are paid to do the research. They are paid to verify the story.

They are paid to provide trust.

Twitter is great for breaking news, blogs are great for opinion, but only paid journalists provide the trust that drives real loyal, returning, paying readership.

The issue here is not the internet. It is money.

There will always be jobs for journalists because as much as people love gossip, they hate being lied to, intentionally or not.

If newspapers and mainstream media would simply realize that they do not need to compete with the immediacy of blogging and social media then they will be taking a step in the right direction.

If they realize that their business is not in fact providing the news, but providing trust worthy accurate news, then they’ll be taking a step in the right direction.

If they realize, that it’s simply human nature for people to gravitate towards trusted sources they’ll realize just what it is they need to be doing.

Journalists provide the vital function of delivering that trust but, as the numbers of people aspiring to be journalist increases, so do the number of people who may have a flair for writing but little integrity or work ethic.

This is what “old media” publishers need to be worried about. Diluting the value of the journalist by providing any old hack with a paid mouth piece.

The way forward is to strengthen the bond between journalist and consumer and this is done by putting mechanisms in place to ensure that what the journalist is reporting is as accurate as possible.

The internet has provided journalists, lazy and not, the means to get access to exponentially increased volumes of gossip that ever before. The publishers need to ensure that the journalists are not exploiting this, or being put under pressure to publish unresearched gossip as news.

Publishers need to help journalists provide trust. Help them develop the means to verify sources and information gathered from the wild west of gossip reporting that is social media.  To help them discover the truth amongst the gossip and opinion.

If they can help them build their trust value, their integrity, their reputation as a worthy outlet for news, then the money will flow and there will be more jobs and respect for real journalists.

The world needs journalists to be that mainstay of integrity because there isn’t much of it amongst the gossiping, marketing and spam driven social media world and I, for one, fear integrity’s death completely to the advertising buck!

CNN reporter linked to Michael Jackson’s death!

The reporters (and I use the term very loosely) at CNN are apparently so starved for news, so desperate for page views and have such a tenuous grasp on reality that they now resort to groping at the thinnest and most improbable of straws in order to create a headline.

Today there was a post about a generic version of a drug being recalled from the maker because two lots of it had been tainted by some contaminant.

Now, as story, it stands up by itself. The reporter could have kept things short and sweet, telling the truth, that the drug is manufactured by 3 different companies and that the brand name, as well as the product from the two other manufacturers, is still on the market.

But guess what CNN decided to do instead?

That’s right, they decided to go for the most flimsy and ridiculous thread they could find, which is that Michael Jackson had “reportedly” taken the brand version while he was still capable of doing the moonwalk.

The result was an article entitled: “Generic version of drug linked to Michael Jackson recalled”.

What’s even worse is that, not only is this a ridiculously far fetched piece of link bait, but within the first two paragraphs of the article, they completely destroy their own reason for using the headline.

(CNN) — Two tainted lots of a generic version of a drug reportedly taken by Michael Jackson have been recalled by the drug maker.

However, no link has been established between the drug — a powerful sedative and anesthetic called propofol — and the singer’s death.

I’ve added the underlines to the quote to highlight the idiocy of what they are suggesting, as well  I almost find myself needing to scream: “You idiot! Of course there is no link – he’s not taking that version of the drug!”

Let’s get this straight: The recalled drug was called “Propofol”, Jackson was reported to have used “Diprivan”, the brand version, at some point while he was alive? Get it? Good.

This kind of “link-baiting”, this grasping at imaginary straws, this connecting of two completely unrelated events in an attempt to draw visitors to a, let’s admit it, barely news-worthy post, is quite simply not the level of integrity or professionalism expected from one one of the largest news outlets in the world.

The kind of logic employed and apparently acceptable to the editor of that post, would also allow me, if I was working for a news agency with similar low standards, to get away with the title of this post, simply because CNN had someone cover and report on the events surrounding Jackson’s death.

It’s just over 17 months ago since I wrote about my belief that most bloggers simply don’t have what it takes to be mainstream reporters, but as I look at how far mainstream media has fallen with their reporting standards, I may have to eat my words.

It seams that any hack with a keyboard can call themselves a journalist these days.

Grammar Police: They have me wound up again

Yeah, the Grammar Nazi’s have been at it again lately and I’m sure you all know that they really chaff my ass (almost as much as the PC crowd), so I felt the need to have a little rant about them.

Sorry for the poor lighting, but this was just a “get it off your chest” video…

Why some “theme designers” are lazy bastards that waste my time

There are some awesome, hard working and inspirational theme designers out there, but some so called “theme designers” are simply lazy bastards that churn out theme after theme with little or no variation between them.

Many seem to think that it’s acceptable to simple change the header graphic (or something similar) on a theme and release it as an entirely new theme.

Some may even get adventurous enough to change a few minor elements of the css file, such as the color of links and consider that, coupled with a header change, to be a new theme.

Well screw you lazy bastards! When I’m looking for a theme to either use or build off for a project,I don’t need or want, to trawl through theme directories that are full of the same frickin theme posted with 20 different headers and 20 different names.

If you want to have more than one header for your theme, launch the theme with a header chooser. The same goes for the css. Give the user the option of which css style they’d like to apply within the themes admin menu.

But please, stop flooding theme directories with the same theme over and over again because you are either too lazy to code in the choice or are just greedily seeking attention for your theme. All you’re doing is pissing people off and making it nigh on impossible to find themes that are actually worth using or building off.

Also, while I’m at it, if you feel the need to release your theme 20 times, with 20 headers and 20 names, then the chances are you’re over compensating for the fact that your theme is shit!

How about you invest the time you’d otherwise spend in adding and uploading all these variations into actually polishing, refining and delivering a kick ass theme instead of 20 piles of penguin droppings? People might actually want your theme then!

Note: The theme designers and groups I’ve linked to in this post do both free and premium themes. I have no affiliation with them or their work, I just like their themes.

Social Media Douchebags! Who tops your list?

One thing that bothers me about social media and this entire web 2.0/3.0/stardate 7265.39 climate that we have today is the number of self professed “experts” and “gurus” out there.

I’ve been around the web since pretty much the beginning and if there is one thing I am not, it’s an expert at all this stuff. I never will be. It’s a continually changing landscape with constantly emerging technologies and challenges and in order to get ahead in this, you are on a constant learning curve.

Perhaps, the one thing I do have however, is experience and from that perspective I can tell you, that the vast majority of “experts” are little better than the snake oil salesmen of the 1900’s and televangelists (because for some reason their omnipotent and all powerful god always needs your money!).

Let’s be honest, the vast majority of people involved in the social media/marketing game are just out their to make a quick buck at your expense. The web (and I bet your town) is full of intelligent, highly talented and proficient people, who are willing to give you, for free, their advice, time and help for little more than the chance to network and meet new people and friends.

(As a side note Social Media/Marketing = Social + Media, or Social and Media, or S&M! Think about it!)

Right, let me get to my point here.

Over a year ago, Kevin Dixie (of FuelMyBlog) and I were discussion the fact that all of the social networks always have a list of people you are recommended to follow when you join (or worse yet a list of people automatically added to your friends list) and the fact that this is just plain unfair.

A lot of these people are there, well, because they are on somebody else’s list, which inflated their “popularity” enough that the next site to come along says “Well, they’re on the Facebook/Twitter/Friendster list, that means they should be on ours!”

See where I’m going with this?

You have a situation where the vast majority of “popular” people are either artificially inflated (and not just in terms of their numbers, think silicone), are trying to sell you something, or are involved in obsessive compulsive circle-jerking with other marketers and “experts”.

So what does this have to do with Kevin, or even with you? I’m only stating what we all know already!

Well, here’s the kicker, back when Kevin and I were having that discussion we considered making a “Social Media Douchebags” list.

Basically an “anti-recommended” list.

A list of marketers (@mike_wesely),  trolls (@arrington), people who don’t even bother to write their own stream (@guykawasaki), and bleached blonde wannabes (@ijustine “I am the internet”? What all your ports or open or anybody can log on?) who consider themselves “stars” just because they have a large number of followers. A list of people who take your time, flood your stream and give little back. A list of people who are only popular because of the sheep mentality (@aplusk, @oprah)!

Today I propose that the list finally gets built.

If you’ve got someone you love to hate add their twitter address in the comments below and say why. Over the next few days I’ll sort and compose the list together (giving credit to all and adding in the reasons why!) and post the “name and shame” list of douchebags here.

Maybe then some of these people will stop what they’re doing, change their practices and I don’t know… stop being douchebags?

Who’s on your list of “Social Media Douchebags” and why?

Dear Oprah – I’ve got but one life…

Oprah, I know you’ve got all the money in the world.

I know that, among your legions of slavering idiot sheep stalkers loyal fans, you’d have more than a few who would willingly lay down their lives for you and allow you to have your brain transplanted to their body so you could continue to share your bullshit brilliance, should you kick the bucket something unfortunate happen.

But please, don’t assume that I, or anyone else, has access to your money, kidnappers or legions of brainwashed idiots fans to facilitate an eternal life.

Quite frankly, I find your twitter bio offensive:

Live Your Best Life

Us mere mortals have but one life, there is no best or worst!

Here we go again… More top down religious insanity

I’m not gay, despite popular rumor, nor do I harbor any animosity towards the practitioners of any particular religion. I am an atheist and would venture that one of the first things you have to admit while being a “practicing atheist” (now there’s a contradiction in terms) is that you may be wrong.

I have to admit to having a hard time admitting that I’m wrong and I suppose I should ‘fess up and let you know that there are really only three groups of people whom I harbor any kind of ill will towards: The leaders of hate groups, sheep shaggers (there’s a whole jealousy aspect involved there) and finally all those arrogant, ignorant, self important, trumped up little shits who hold themselves up as champions of the politically correct (PC) movement.

Trawling through the online version of the Indo today I cam across a piece by my new “man crush” about this ridiculous new resolution by the United Nations (UN = Universally Neutered?) to protect the “religious sensibilities” of all member states.

Quoting O’Doherty:

So, now it’s against the law to have a crack about religion? That is what the lunatics, despots and criminals who drive the United Nations would have us subjected to after Monday’s motion calling for all member states to enact a binding resolution “restricting people from ridiculing, defaming religion, specifically Islam”.

First I read it. Then I took a sip of coffee. Read it again, and proceed to rant and rave to myself about the idiocy of it all. (The ranting was all very intellectual, I assure you, but unfortunately there was nobody here to hear it.)

My first question is this, why the hell is Islam getting a specific mention here? Are they in someway special? Are they super sensitive? Is it the towel wraps or something – I never really thought they looked that cool! Do they spontaneously combust if you slag off their religion? Or does it have something to do with that sad asshole faction of the Muslim faith that go from commentary to arms and violence in less time than it takes me to order a pint of Guinness?

But I’m not picking on the Muslims.

I’m seething at the sheer ignorance and idiocy of the whole thing! According to this new resolution, this post would be breaking the law. My arms are outstretched – cuff me!!

Resolutions like this are the highest form of idiocy!

Let me make this very simple and very very clear.

I have a right to take the piss out of you. It’s called freedom of speech. I have the right to question your religion, I have the right to ridicule it, to make a joke of it and to tell you flat out that I don’t agree with you.

I was in Denmark for the whole Jyllands-Posten Muhammad cartoon controversy. I supported the Danish position that, quite frankly, creating cartoons of Muhammad was in fact displaying that Muslim faith had become integrated into Danish society. After all, they were just treating the Muslims they way they treated every other aspect of religious society, including their own predominant faith, but taking the piss out of it. You know, no special treatment, just abuse everybody equally!

And what did we see from segments of the Muslim society (worldwide)? We were treated to displays of violence, hatred, anger, destruction and calls for the killing of innocent people. Let’s be honest, if you’re going to throw temper tantrums of that magnitude it proves three things:

1. That you have no sense of humor, at all! Whatsoever! Period!
2. That you are a fanatical bunch of lunatics who deserve to have the piss taken out of you.
3. That such behavior endorses the need for people to be able to defame and ridicule religion as it may be our only means of protecting and informing others about the dangerous nut job elements of various religions!

Religion has long been the tool of the conqueror and the dictator to control the week minded and uneducated masses in order to achieve their less than morally correct goals.

The ability to defame religion, to criticize it, to satirize it, it’s idols and leaders has been the means by which those with more than a few brain cells have protected and informed those who have been content to remain as sheep.

Removing the ability to speak out against religion in any form, be it Muslim, Christian, Hindu or the Flying Spaghetti Monster leaves everybody open to the abuses which are best perpetrated by people in the name of religion, and removes any ability we may have to speak out against those injustices.

This UN resolution is the modern day equivalent of gagging the alter boy and the handcuffing his hands behind his back (and it’s too cheap to even offer him a Mars bar afterwards).